~ Humor ~

 Tech Support from Outer Bangbasherash

At 04:13 PM 2/27/2008, you wrote:

DEAR TECH-SUPPORT:
 
Here's my problem... I visit a website... Website takes awhile to... but soon ..."freezes," meaning I cannot...
 
All the system will allow me to do is... At that a little box informs me that... and asks...
 
So I call...  tells me my problem is not with my... but with my...  What to do?  ... says get a new... OR use a...
 
Is he... with me?  If so... how can I get...?
 
It's miserable being so dumb and helpless...


Dear Miserable, Dumb and Helpless,

Greeting! My name Tote Leeink Umpitant. We receive at office here in Twangpoon request that you have troubles with computer. We examine your situation most carefully and talk much about it along side of coffee pot. You know the pot help us with realization of many problem. We even show supervisor who sometime ruminate with us. He wise man and nose many thing.

We think cause of great difficulties with computer you have is close at our grasp. We think you very nice person. This not factual, no? But cause of problem is you very nice person in every way except on computer you is nincompoop. You let us help you no yes?

Here some several thing you try. One maybe neuter you of troubles.

1. Climb beneath belly of desk to make surly unit plug robustly flirting with wall socket.
2. Make side-ways dance of mouse to visualize pointer move on screen.
3. Is proper voltage to house from voltage provider firm?
4. Scurry monitor unit back and fourth rabidly to clear screen.
5. Leave over night bowl of rice and curry for which to rice favor with of computer ant sisters. (If away in morning computer all better or else you have living within you rats.)
6. Remove software from bowels of computer and clean hilariously.
7. Try pot you self maybe you find problem.
8. Be most diligent tourist to dump for finding of better computer.

If one of this suggestion not do the deception then you send troublesome message again and I send you more suggestion.

~~~

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